How your FEAR won’t let you Win!

We all use information from past experiences, our emotions, and needs to make decisions and take action. Our decisions are usually made based on fear or love. But we don’t like to call it fear (because that would be embarrassing!). Instead, we feel self-doubt, frustration, anger, jealousy.

But wouldn’t it be nice to act from a place of love? Real, sustainable change can only happen when we change our motivation to act from fear to love.

How has fear stopped you from taking action towards your goals? When did you regret doing something out of fear?

If you’ve already made this change, how are you acting out of love now? Share your story below to inspire others!

RI Fit Magazine

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Check out my article on Change Vs. Progress in RI Fit Magazine page 54!

Heard of RI Fit Magazine? They are RI’s hottest and healthiest new resource for fitness, wellness, and overall health. Check out their April issue online or in print for FREE at hundreds of locations in and around Rhode Island. The best part is that they feature local Rhode Islander’s that are fit and motivating! You’ll probably see someone featured that you already know! #smallstate #RIproud

 

Are You a Hater?

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Ever find yourself making this face? Yeah, not so pretty is it?! It’s like you have to put actual, conscious effort into making this face. That means sending disdain and negativity into your body in order to make this expression! 

What? Why?! Sounds terrible, right? 

So why do we sometimes create negativity from within ourselves and send it outwards into the world via this nasty face?

– You don’t like someone.

– Something is not working out in your favor.

– You see someone as the competition.

On the surface you may say, “yeah, I can see myself hating on someone for those reasons.” In that case, I challenge you to take a deeper look at why you are hating…

– Are you jealous? Probably! Find out why.

– Are you reflecting on your own weaknesses when you see someone else excelling? 

– Do you secretly feel everything should work out for you? Why? What makes you so special?

Don’t hate, appreciate. 

How can you turn that awful face and self-created hate into positive appreciation for the person or thing?

– See the person as a blessing that’s pushing you to be better (the competition trigger).

– Understand your jealousy towards someone, and instead, use that energy to work on improving yourself versus beating others down (the “don’t like” trigger).

– See how this situation can be a learning experience and benefit you down the road (the “not in my favor” trigger).

Ever caught yourself making this face or creating the hate? Tell us about it! What did you do to correct it ? Share your comments below!

Be your best self today,

Brittany

Change Vs. Progress

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 “Only two things in life are certain – death and taxes.” Heard this before? Definitely rings true during tax season! But I’d like to propose that something else is certain as well:

Change.

While it often seems that we’re stuck in a rut, we know that change will come. Why? Because it has every time before! We used to be little, then we grew. We used to have flip phones, now we have iPhones.  We used to have no clue about our health, now we’re educated on how to be healthy.

 We know change is coming; yet we still talk about making changes as if it’s some elusive challenge. Change is certain. Progress is not.

So what’s progress? Progress in your fitness? Nutrition? Overall health? If change is anything different from the status quo, then progress is a change that is more specific, goal-oriented, and measurable. 

Progress is a measure of relativity. You’re moving towards change in a specific direction. Movement on that trajectory is identified as progress. If you altered your habits to lose weight, but it resulted in weight gain, this is change but not progress. If you started a healthy diet to lose weight, and we’re gradually losing the weight, this is progress.

You need a goal in order to measure progress from change. PS- “I want to be healthy” is not a goal, it’s a statement. Make sure your goal has specifics, a timeline, and is measurable. 

Specifics: Try “I will eat 3 servings of vegetables daily” versus “I will eat healthy”. By articulating the specific thing you will do, you will be more likely to actually do it!

Timeline: Create timeframes, start dates, and deadlines for yourself. Otherwise, your “Someday” will likely never come. Here’s a sample of a timeline – “I will eat 3 servings of vegetables daily for 6 consecutive weeks, beginning March 9th.”

Measurement: How do you know you’re not at your goal already? How do you know if you’re making progress towards your goal? Most importantly, how will you know when you’ve reached your goal? Measurement. This is key to the whole process of making progress and achieving your best self.

Ask yourself these questions to assess your goal for measurability:

–       Can you count it?

–       Can you create a percentage from your results to determine your progress? (i.e. I ate 3 servings of veggies 3 out of 5 days thus far= 60% progress towards goal).

 –       Can you make adjustments to your goal based on your findings from your percentage and experience? (i.e. maybe only 2 servings of veggies daily is more reasonable for you. Maybe 5 days weekly versus 7 is better for you).

*This is not to say that you should lower your standards, but continuing to progress on an adjusted goal is more beneficial than failing miserably on a strict, unattainable goal.

Ok, Let’s go over what we know:

–       We know that change will come. The question is how, when, and in which direction?

–       We know that progress is necessary for improvement, not just change.

–       We need a goal in order to distinguish progress from change.

–       Our goal needs to be specific, have a timeline, and be measurable in order to evaluate progress.

 If you don’t have a plan, you plan to fail. So make a plan, make progress and achieve your goals. This success will build your momentum for future goals and future successes. Progress, not change, is necessary to become your best self

Serious About Change: Dr. McKaila Allcorn

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Meet Dr. McKaila Allcorn. She is just like the rest of us in that she’s a daughter, wife, and has a demanding job.

But she’s different from us in a few ways too. McKaila had the discipline and commitment to significantly change her body, and as a result, improve her life! 

So, what was the last straw McKaila?

“I had trained for 3 months to run a half marathon with some friends. I had been running several times per week and pushed myself during the race, only to find that I had lost 1 pound throughout the whole process! I know there had to be a better way to lose weight and get healthy.”

Like many of us, McKaila wanted better for herself and needed to change her ways. She had been busy in medical school and her residency at Kent Hospital, and let her health become less of a priority. But continuing on this path was a not an option for her if she was going to live the life she wanted and help care for others who are sick as an ER doctor.

So what did you do?

“I am from Oklahoma and had a friend back home that had talked with me about this product called Juice Plus+. So I did my research and found that I was going to have to significantly change my diet if I was going get healthy and lose weight.” Juice Plus+ provides whole food nutrition in a capsule so you can get the fruits and vegetables your body needs to run most effectively. It’s then next best thing to actual fruits and vegetables for a busy lifestyle.

McKaila says she loves this product because they provide nutrition plans and education. This knowledge can empower sustainable change for people’s diets. Additionally, the nutrition plan encourages you to try several different diets, such as gluten free, vegan, vegetarian, etc. That way, you can see what your body responds to, and cater your meal planning from there.  All diets aren’t right for everyone, so find the plan that works for you and get after it!

But it wasn’t just supplements that changed McKaila’s body. Not even close! Real foods and preparation are requirements! McKaila said she would cook several meals on Sundays and package them up so she’d be ready for work, snacks, and any other time that would tempt her away from her goals.

McKaila said she notice a big energy boost after making these changes – along with better skin, and friends who had reported getting off medications because of the positive effect real foods had on them.

So as long as I eat right I’ll have these results?

Wrong again! McKaila said she was also in search for something that would nourish her physically, mentally, and spiritually. Yoga. Several times a week, no excuses. Rain or shine. “If you’re going to make a real lifestyle change, you have to be consistent. It can’t just be when you feel like it.” McKaila is currently training to become a yoga teacher and share with others the positive experience she’s had with yoga and it’s supportive community at Laughing Elephant yoga in East Greenwich.

Any tips for the rest of us? 

“Find your motivation. Mine was my long-term health. I used positive self-talk to get through those tough days.” Time management is very important too. Make sure to make a date with healthy cooking and the gym that you won’t flake out on!

Doctor McKaila mentions that obesity is a risk factor for so many diseases and conditions that are life threatening. So don’t be a victim – get healthy, get active and regain control of your life!

 What are your health and fitness goals for 2014? Will YOU be the next person we feature for Serious About Change?

Make Change Stick!

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Happy Monday! I know a lot of people who look at Mondays as an opportunity for a fresh start and chance to make a change. What’s something you want to change? 

So what do people do to make this change stick? Yes, I can eat a very healthy meal and I can exercise for 3 days in a row. But what makes for lasting change? What determines the success of those are able to make stick it out? 

Here are 5 ways people have made lasting lifestyle changes in their lives:

– Hit rock bottom to face change: Being forced to lose weight or exercise due to severe health consequences (i.e. diabetes).

– Take baby steps: Set a realistic change goal for your diet by eliminating one food item at a time.

– It takes a village: Get a support team in place that you can call in a time of need. Kind of like a change sponsor!

– What’s in your environment: Are you trying to drink less but work at a bar? Hmmm…. Consider working somewhere different to increase the likelihood of your success. Can’t change your job? Look at smaller changes that will influence your behavior. 

– Take Einstein’s advice: The definition of insanity is “doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results.” So if you’ve tried to make a change and it’s not working, Albert says to try something else! 

Let’s hear it! What are doing to make a change in your life? I want to hear what’s working and what hasn’t for you! Comment below now!

Acceptance and Change

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In psychotherapy, we often speak of self-love and acceptance as modalities to move on from our past and parts of ourselves we are unhappy with. For instance, a therapist may suggest that someone who is now clean and sober accept this aspect of who they are and the choices they made when they were drinking. 

However, people who are motivate to change likely aren’t satisfied with themselves in some regard, and are looking to make a positive change. So, working towards self acceptance while trying to initiate change is very difficult.

So how do we do it?!

Originally developed by Marsha Linehan out of the University of Washington, Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT) has proven to be an effective modality in achieving self-acceptance and simultaneously creating positive change. In a nutshell, DBT incorporates Buddhist mindfulness techniques in conjunction with cognitive behavioral therapy to promote acceptance and generate change.

DBT was initially developed to treat people with borderline personality disorder. However, research also supports positive outcomes for using DBT with people diagnosed with mood disorders (anxiety/depression/bipolar), trauma survivors, substance use disorders, and those engaging in self-injurious behaviors. 

DBT uses 4 modules to facilitate this process:

1. Mindfulness: observing yourself and your environment non-judgmentally (acceptance).

2. Distress Tolerance: recognizing and accepting negative situations instead of avoiding or becoming overwhelmed by them (acceptance).

3. Emotional Regulation: Identify obstacles to changing emotions, and use mindfulness to learn about emotions (change).

4. Interpersonal Effectiveness: learning assertiveness and interpersonal problem solving that preserves relationships (change).

 

So what techniques can you take away from this and practice today?

-Ground yourself; use deep breathing and meditation to stay present.

-Self soothe when stress; using music or other activities you enjoy.

-Improve communication; use “I Feel” statements to better share your emotions.

What works for you? What’s your go-to coping skill? How do you share your feelings with others? Comment below!

Find your Bliss

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What is your passion? 

What makes you come alive?

What ignites your drive? 

What motivates your change?

Who are you? And how are you different when you are doing the things you answered above? How much happier would you be if you could be that person everyday

So what’s holding you back? Do one thing for yourself this week that makes you come alive and ignites your best self! Find your bliss…and you find your true self.